Monday, September 29, 2014

I'm having a BABY...

Yes!!! I said I am having a baby!! *blank stare* I am still in shock
As of today I am 23 weeks and 5 days pregnant. This will be my first child but not my first pregnancy.. I have never been this far along before so I am honestly still shocked that I am pregnant everyday...Lol
Ok let's start from the beginning..
So like I just said this is not my first pregnancy I have been pregnant 3 times before. I have miscarried each one of those pregnancy, I have never made it past 5 weeks with any of them.
So to be 23 weeks and 5 days pregnant is totally mind blowing to me right now!! lol
The last time I found out was pregnant was last year around Thanksgiving. I was so very excited and happy,but God had a different plan for me and that baby as well. Unfortunately I lost the baby on Christmas Day:-( I was so very hurt, crushed,and depressed. It took me about 3 to 4 weeks to get over losing the baby. I felt like my body was worthless and that I would never be able to carry child period. The things that were going through my mind were horrible like, "You're never meant to be a mother! "Stick with having a dog as a child"! Just be the best Aunt and God mother you can be!!
It wasn't like I was trying to get pregnant on purpose each and every time it just happened..
So anyway, after this last miscarriage I told my boyfriend that was the last straw I was going to get on Birth Control and I was going to stay on it until I was 50!!!
So I went to my gynecologist for a checkup. She told me nothing was wrong with my wound no infections, no fibroid, just nothing out of the ordinary that would make me miscarry that many times. Wait, Lets back track a little bit when I found out I was pregnant on Thanksgiving that following Monday I immediately made an appointment with her because of my history. The nurse got me in that Tuesday for lab they drew my blood. My results came back that following evening that's when they told me my progesterone was low and I needed to take progesterone pills.I was taking those pills twice a day, basically what the progesterone does is makes sure your body knows its pregnant. So I was on that for about 3 weeks FAITHFULLY!!! BUT, yet and still I miscarried so I was so confused!!!
Okay now back to what we were talking about..after the miscarriage I wanted birth control had to be on birth control I wanted it in my life!!! So she gave me a standing prescription at my pharmacy. So I was doing very good with my BC for a couple of months. So I ended up loosing my birth control pills and forgetting to take it I was under a lot of stress. We had just moved into a new place, relationship issues were coming up, and I was having a tough little time with life. SO..It slipped my mind for a couple of days and then this happened....

Yep!!! I was pregnant again.....
So I'm not even going to lie this time..When I took the test I thought I was pregnant because my cycle hadn't arrived yet and I also thought it was due to stress as well. I was thinking to myself I know God is not going to do this to me again! Honestly, I was tired of all the hurt, pain, and disappoint can't forget the doctor's bills as well!! So I was kinda upset! Hey I'm just being honest!! LOL
I took this test right before I was heading out to go to my part time job. It was actually my first day there for orientation.
I called my boyfriend on my way there... This is how the convo went no lie!!
Me: Hey,WYD
Him: Working Duh...
Me: Ugh, I got something to tell you*sigh*
Him: What girl??(He's so dramatic Lol)
Me: I'm pregnant,AGAIN
Him: I knew it before you even told me!!
Me: Don't get your hopes up again, I have already been cramping and I am just waiting on the process to start for the miscarriage..
Him: Don't say that we will just think positive and pray everything will be okay!
Me: Ummm, yeah I guess well I'm about to go into this orientation, I'll talk to you later!!
Him: Okay, I love you
Me: I love you too, Bye!!
Well, as you can tell I wasn't trying to be all happy about it because I didn't want to get attached AT ALL!!! So I didn't tell anyone not even my MOMMY!!! So I was still living life as usual working and picking up my heavy niece holding her everyday!! Dancing with my niece running and everything you could imagine for the first 5weeks!
But the next following week I became very ill every morning!!  I was throwing up all the time I couldn't keep anything down! I was so sick I had to go to the ER and my mom had to take me so of course she found out I was pregnant. She was happy running around telling everybody she could almost.
So I was sick for days that I didn't know wouldn't stop until I hit 20 weeks!! Yeah that's another blog post by its self!!! Anyway I made me an appointment with a new doctor that I had been hearing good things about her so I wanted to try something different this time around. I made me an appointment and I told my boyfriend I said if we go in here and they don't see anything on the ultrasound we are prepared. We were prepared for the good and the bad.
I went to my first appointment and I was super nervous!!! My blood pressure was sky high when they checked it! LOL My doctor came is she is super sweet btw!! I love her to pieces I would recommend her to anyone!!! So she was telling to be calm and everything will be ok and to think positive! When it was time for her to take me to the ultrasound room I was so scared I even told her that... So when we got in there she immediately put the machine on my stomach. The first thing that popped up was my baby peanut just moving around without a care in the world!!!
My baby's first pic LOL
Tear!!! My boyfriend cried like a baby lamb. I couldn't do nothing but smile and laugh at his cry baby tail!!!!!
I was so happy!! I felt like God had been listening to my prayers and wanted me to be patient.
So pregnancy kicked my butt for the first 4mths I was so sick I couldn't keep anything down. Everything I smelled made me sick, things I loved to eat I couldn't.
I celebrated my 30th birthday over the toilet throwing up all day long not from partying but from my baby love.
But, I'm not complaining he's not even here yet but I would still throw up til this day if it meant for me to have a healthy baby and for him to continue to grow like he is still doing.
I found out we were having a BOY on Sept 26

He is doing GREAT!!! I feel his little kicks everyday it's so weird..It feels like he is in there tap dancing on my bladder!! LOL
All and all I am so excited!! I am praying everyday and asking God to keep me and my child under his hand of protection! Please keep us in your prayers! If you can't think of anything else to pray for..Pray for my baby's lungs,fingers,toes,arms etc...LOL
Guess what???!! It's official I'm a Mommy Blogger NOW!!!! WHOOP!WHOOP!!
Here's a little pic of me and my baby bump its not that big I really can't tell I'm pregnant but others can!!!

More Updates coming soon...